Introduction Letter
Dear Professor Brad,
I
am writing to formally introduce myself to you. My name is Joleen Tan, and I am
a first-year robotics systems engineering student from the Singapore Institute
of Technology. I recently graduated from Temasek Polytechnic with a diploma in
Cybersecurity and Digital Forensics.
I
have always enjoyed building things from scratch even until now, where I enjoy activities
such as knitting, embroidering, and building Lego sets. This passion made me
decide to take the leap of faith from IT to engineering as I want to be able to
make something with my hands and watch it come to life. Additionally, with the
increase in demand for automation, I am confident that I will be able to secure
a job that lines with my passion after graduation with this degree.
My
strength in communication lies in knowing when to speak and when to listen.
During conversations, I am able to provide a listening ear while throwing in
necessary inputs. Furthermore, with my knack for being engaging with people, I
am able to keep the conversation flowing when needed.
However,
I get nervous when speaking in front of a crowd. As a result, I tend to rush
through my points and am unable to speak confidently and clearly. Occasionally,
I will even skip some points on purpose without elaborating on the other points
just so I can finish the presentation earlier.
One of my goals for this module is to be more comfortable and more confident with public speaking. My second goal is to adopt critical thinking into my everyday life, so I can form valid arguments and add credibility to my words.
Yours
sincerely,
Joleen
Tan
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThank you for taking the time to introduce yourself.
ReplyDeleteIn your letter, you shared your hobbies and passion for RSE, as well as your strengths and weaknesses in communication. However, I believe you missed out on your past working experiences. Also, the final paragraph can be shortened with one less quantifier.
"more comfortable and more confident" > "more comfortable and confident"
This letter is engaging and enjoyable to read. In this letter, you shared your hobbies in building things from scratch, which explains your passion in robotics and explained your communication strength and weakness clearly. Even though you do not have relevant work experience, I think it will be good to share some work experience and try to link it with your strength/weakness.
ReplyDeleteDear Joleen,
ReplyDeleteThank you for this fine letter with the personal sharing. I appreciate the clarity and conciseness of the content, which is well aligned with the assignment brief. You also effectively organize your thoughts and express yourself in generally flawless English.
You've also done a very fine job providing supporting information for each specific content area, allowing readers to gain a better understanding of who you are. I appreciate how you explain that you developed an interest in robotics in childhood by building or creating things "from scratch."
From the discussion of your comm skills strength, being a good listener and an engaging conversationalist, t's easy to see that you have the sort qualities required of a person in management. My challenge to you in class is tto be more vocal.
I look forward to witnessing your development and working with you for the rest of the term.
Cheers,
Brad